crutches

On Thursday my mom sat up from a chair after watching some tv and she fell to the floor. She said it was like her foot was not even there. A possible explaination for this would be the numbness in her extremities that was caused by the chemo.

She managed to crawl to the couch and wait for someone to come home to help her. Went I got home she told me about what happened and wanted me to retrieve my crutches. I did, but like most people I know she is not very coordinated with them. As time passed her foot swelled up and we were not sure whether it was a break or sprain.

She called my dad at work and he did not show the tiniest bit of surprise at her story. At this point I don't think that my dad can be surprised at anything you tell him in such cases. Unless of course some body part has happened to part ways.

He came home and they went to the ER. They were there for only a few hours since someone they knew was working there at the time. She came home with the news that is a bad sprain and that she is to stay off of it for about a week.

She really hates the crutches and continues to try to figure out a way to walk without them.

tokyo diner

Continuing with the theme of international cuisine this week, Monday was Indian, we went out for Japanese food today for lunch. We went to the Tokyo Diner since it was the only place I knew of. When we got there we had figure out how to get in since the front doors were boarded up in a haphazard fashion. We ended up going next store and walking through it into the diner. Upon getting inside we were offered sushi or hibachi. The guy I was with did not like sushi so hibachi it was.

We were seated at the grill and looked at the menu. They offered every combination of shrimp, chicken and steak you can think of, which is like 7, and that was pretty much it. We placed our orders and then waited at the hibachi grill for the maestro of japanse flair to arrive. Then the Golden Girls walked in and were seated with us. Just what I wanted, 3 old ladies talking about their sexual exploits. Not fun at all. OK that did not happen but there were 3 old ladies.

The guy wheeled his cart out and reconfirmed the orders then started flinging vegetables and rice around. He made the tradtional onion volcano and even had a little statue of a boy dressed like a fireman to pee on our food. He cooked the meat and added a ton of sauces i could not identify and then scooped the food to the plates leaving several trails of crumbs in his wake.

The food was actually pretty good. Better then i was expecting. I would go back but only for lunch because the dinner prices were ridiculous, unless of course those come with a Happy Ending, then I'm in.

After we got back to work it was the usual boring busy work except my ass decided that it wanted some attention. So the farting storm began and no one was safe, not even me. Most of the time it is the other guys letting them rip but for one short afternoon i was king. My farts were sneaky too. I would release one and then it would take a minute to gather potency, then it assaulted all you senses. I swear the air got hazy. I made one guy's eyes water, another took refuge in his shirt and the third guy who has quite the beak on him had to get up and leave for i had overloaded his nostrils. This continued for about 3 hrs. I was told i smelled like a wombat and eggs.

I blamed it on lunch for it was the only thing i could do. I have been told that i can never eat there again.

miss america pageant

You may wonder what i could possibly have to say about this. well today at work i found out who Miss PA was in the pageant this year. A guy at work told me that she graduated from Millersville so we investigated a little and found an picture of her. She looked so familiar but i did not think i met her before. then it hit me like a freight train. i had met her. hell i even talked to her very briefly.

She was friend's with clothes obsessed, airhead of a roomate, Dave. Her name is Nicole Brewer and if i remember correctly she was not much in the brains department either. My example is as follows, which is a true event.

Her:*slings a sack of Dave's laundry over her shoulder and prepares to leave the room*
Me: *makes some wise crack about how she looks like Santa*
Her:"Are you calling me fat?!?"
Me:"No. I was referring to you sack of laundry."

Someone was there with me for this but i can not remember who. I thought about this and it has been 5 yrs or so since i made this comment to her. Had i not had the chance to make this crack i prolly would not have remembered her at all.


--: I told a girl at work i would draw at picture for her, but she said it had to be funny, and i assume appropriate for the workplace since it will be on a big dry erase board at work. any ideas?

office space

Today was the usual witty banter among co workers at work, the laborious task of matching what a spreadsheet says to what it actually present in the unsorted, uninventoried warehouse and the nonchalant tossing of radios through the air to destinations unknown, but with an added bonus. While taking our sweet as time removing boxes from the warehouse to happen across a discarded computer monitor. Our eyes widened and we all looking at each other with the same thought on all our minds, "OFFICE SPACE". If ever there was a time to vent frustration at work this was it.

Each of the three of us scattered in different direction to collect what we needed. One grabbed the monitor, one grabbed the key and made the phone call to open the door, and the other found a 8ft metal pole to bludgeon with.

We each took our best javelin throws at the screen in an attempt to harpoon this display cube. And each time the monitor mocked us by not giving in. A few light scratches were the only evident the monitor was touched. Frustration was apparent. We could not devote an extensive amount of time on this so we gave up but I in one last attempt picked it up and power bombed in it the dumpster. A 4 inch crack in the plastic exterior was all that I was rewarded with, screen still very much intact. Fuckin piece of shit.

--:A few days ago one of the hot girls at work was hit in the head with a radio when it fell off a shelf. ironically she was wearing a wonder woman shirt at the time. i've been talking to her more lately, too bad i don't know if she is seeing anyone.

i feel dumb

at work on friday, i had to make a series of phone calls. for one of these calls the guy had to stand on the other side of the room to perform the specified directions that i asked him to do. to accomplish this he put me on speaker phone. he informed me of this and from that point on in the conversation, i felt compelled to have to speak louder for him to hear me.

after i hung up i realized how dumb this was. that is the point of a speaker phone, there was no need for me to raise my voice.

jealous

Kaylen got a happy meal today with Mr. Tumnus from The L, the W and the W. I am so jealous. i mean not only is he a satyr but you blow in his scarf cuz he doubles as a whistle. i repeat, i'm jealous.