my name is not Skip

Last Thursday, as they occassionally say at my work, "They did me one dirty".

My boss and the webmaster managed to get free lunch from a representative from the website content company that we use to manage our site. He took the both of them out to lunch to discuss things I could only guess about seeing as how I was not invited. I did not even find out about it until I was already a lunch and someone asked why I did not go with them. I had to claim ignorance because I had been kept in the dark about this planned lunch meeting. I was not that pissed since I did not know about before hand but they had all day to say something to me about it and neither of them said anything. If I had known about it for like a week and they said nothing then I would have been pissed.

Later on, when someone jokingly brought it up, the webmaster claimed that it was not his decision to exclude me. Sounds a little fishy but whatever.

Ruby Red

My sister's dog has finally gone into heat for the first time starting about a week and a half ago. I thought she was wiping her ass in my bed, I was wrong.

Apparently what I am about to say my be a little much, don't say I did not warn you.

For the next week or so I have had to clean spots of blood off of my bed sheet and my arm after I carried her somewhere. On Friday, I put her down and it looked like I had been shot. * imagine a visual of me indicating the effected area* Her nipples are erect and her, as my sister calls it, junk it all swollen. Ruby actually rubbed the aforementioned junk on my sister's arm, to with I could not help but laugh about. I guess as an animal, the only sense of hygiene is to lick the effected area, which she has done on numerous occasions now.

Hopefully, when this is over, my sister will find time in her oh so busy schedule to get the dog fixed before another episode of doggie cooter theater.

training

I was in training all last week learning about the exciting world of Visual Basic .NET. I barely managed to stay awake for most of it. Not my fault really. Here's how it went down.

I was going to learn something that I have basically taught to myself in the past few months. I do not know everything and I was hoping this class would fill in the gaps. Anyway, The book had 11 Chapters, and each chapter ranged from 35 to 80 pages in length. The most of the pages are split in half with the top being an example or topic highlights and the bottom being an explanation. Well the instructor, and I call him this because he is far from an actual teacher, had a powerpoint of the top portions.

So with all that in mind, my week consisted of an overhead voice, he stood in the back of the room at a computer most of the week, paraphrasing the book while we looked at the a powerpoint for nearly every agonizing page of the book, cover to cover. He stood in front of any notes he managed to write and then promptly erased them before anyone saw them. There were labs that took upwards of an hour to finish, of which I might have done half.

The deck was stacked against me. I had no choice but to dose off everyday.

fire pies

Ok, I guess they could be called mountain pies as well. Irregardless, I had a few last Saturday night and for the most part they turned out edible. Except for that one that was on the verge of transforming into a bricket. For those of you who don;t know, it's a toasted sandwich you make in a fire.

On Saturday, a few guys from work and a couple of their wives gathered to sit and drink around a fire. It was supposed to be 12 to 15 people. It ended up being more like 6. So with 4 cases of beer and only 6 people you can do that math to show that is a lot of beer.

We played beer pong, which is not easy by firelight, and bitched about work like everyone does. I remember using a wooden fence to hold myself up from falling over from laughter. Beer makes things funnier.

At the end of the night I came home with a large chocolate bar and a bag of marshmallows that were meant for smores that never happened as well as about half the case of beer I had brought. I am now storing it at an undisclosed location for future consumption.

gross

Remember back to when I said I cleared out my room and put most of my clothes and other things I had yet to go thourgh outside under a blue tarp. Well I finally got around to looking at this stuff because I need a pair of pants and they were all outside.

I lifted the tarp and looked in the garbage bag to find it not as waterproof as I had hoped. My clothes were soaked having set outside for a few weeks now. I peeled them apart to reveal every color and texture of mold imaginable. This is not cool. This contained all my good clothes from the inital sorting. Now having looked over these clothes it is uncertain if I can salvage any of them. I looks like because of my own negligence, I have to buy new clothes. I mean some of these clothes I have had for years and they needed replaced, but I wanted to part with them on my own terms.

I also had a bin completely filled with water that smelled bad. This effectively decimated my stockpile of boxers and white socks.

The few things I had refused to keep out there were my NES games and my books. So at least they are safe for now.