Lame Jokes

A couple of jokes I heard this weekend at July 4th party from a person that was a few sheets to the wind. It was later discussed that the jokes are just not funny, but it was his delivery that made all the difference.

Why do elephants paint their balls red?
So they can hide in cherry trees.

Have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree?
No.
Well then, I guess it works.

What makes the loudest noise in the jungle?
An elephant when a gy-raff eats cherries.

The funniest part is that by the end of the sequence of jokes, the guy was so red in the face and short of breathe everyone else could not help but laugh with him.

And a few more I have heard.

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A lic-a-lot-a-puss.

What do you call a gay dinosaur?
My-ass-is-sore-us.

A few things...

No, I did not forget I have a blog. Now that that is over here as we go.

My dad has a miniscal tear in his right knee. He is getting surgery on July 3rd. He will be off work 6 to 8 weeks. There is not word whether or not he will need physical therapy.

The family went on vacation last week leaving me alone with the dog for a week. They came home a day early. Glad I got all the drugged up half naked trick turners out earlier in the week.

I recently reached the 30,000th mile I have put on my car since I bought it nearly 3 years ago.

They had to let the new girl at work go for as they called it, "inconsistence of job". I can be honest when I say that in the 3 monthes she was there I might have had only 2 conversations with her.

My 21 years old cousin had her baby via C-section over last weekend. I have heard he is very small and his name is Aiden (I thnk that is how you spell it). If children in this family are born approximately 4 years apart, then I missed my window.

I got a virus(es) on my pc early last week that made it nearly impossible to work on and not get frustrated. The spyware and virus would come in as fast as I could get rid of them. So I had to regrettingly throw in the towel on the BEAN MACHINE. I had to start over and in doing so chose a new name for my PC. Although inheriting much from it's predicessor, this interation will be known as OSIDIAN.